Tag Archives: Emmoh

THE SPUR

You remember my new guy? we are finally in the system; weekend challenges, youth missions, crusades during Christmas…

My ex too has moved on, he finally gets married and like a good friend should do, I attended their wedding. I have never known why it looked strange because the stares I got told me clearly no one expected I would attend.

When I call my fiancé now an IT guy, you are probably thinking I left the other guy for a better paid jamaa. This guy had just finished college, actually he had not graduated. By the way, did he even have a bank account? Probably a Cooperative bank Yeah account for the Helb loans.

All this time I am battling with pain from the previous experiences. One thing I thank God for, I am able to do my thing without necessarily fearing what people will think. We fought so many unnecessary battles because probably not many people and especially those who mattered in church then were in agreement with the decisions I had made. I have known the devil uses those who are closest to you because that hurts more. At some point I paid rent twice because apparently no one could remember me paying. Very weird accusations were made that were meant to push us away.

As I was reading a book ‘the circle maker’, I was reminded of experiences we go through but because of the issues we are facing, we are not able to see God. Could be relationships like I am talking about, or just life.

When Balaam’s donkey stopped and it couldn’t continue, he just struck it because he thought it was just misbehaving. When the donkey speaks all of us are all marveled by the talking donkey; we don’t realize the donkey just rescued Balaam from the angel who wanted to strike him dead.

Most of us if you are just healing from a broken relationship, all you feel is the pain of rejection. All you feel is like walls are caving in on you. Looking at all the pain and confusion I was in then, I don’t regret. Most of the time when we are hurting all we pray is that things can go our way. That your relationship works and have a happy ending, that your business rises up again, but we are blind to what God is protecting us from.

Can I tell you something? If I was married to the first guy, today you would not be reading this. Surely God has it all figured out. A friend read one of the articles and told me, in the counsel you gave you forgot something, and here comes what missed from the previous article.

I heard this before but I never considered it important. From my own experience I know it matters. It’s no wonder someone said experience is not the best teacher, tried experience is. What am sharing, was tested and tried on me.

Take a way, real wisdom: Way before the first relationship broke, the IT guy had just come into the picture and rumors were so hot. I remember this friend and a leader in the church talking to me and he asked me, “Do you think if you decided to go back to school in the future your guy would be supportive?”

He then went on to say, “You may not be planning to back to school, but would he support your dreams? Are you of one mind? Are you like minded?” All along I thought love is all that matters. Today am of a different opinion.

Would you be comfortable showing off your girl/guy to your crew? You had better have a person you want to take nature walks with as you show them off to the birds in the bushes. Where would I be 14 years down the line if this guy didn’t crash into my life!

In the day and time, we are living today, I don’t know how many of us would comfortably take the kind of ride I chose then. However; you are not defined by what you are going through now. Your future is way great! Better days are ahead. We went for our walks as he pushed his bicycle. Today with these lockdowns, the moments I miss most are not those we raced with other cars along the highways, not the evenings we rode on his bike; all I want is for us just to stroll because I want to appreciate every single minute with him. I wouldn’t mind a limo or a Lamborghini aventador ride, but am extremely happy at where we are today.

Cheer up! God knows your end from the beginning.

Guys! Get a girl who can tell you no. Okay, this is true for any relationship. Someone who can challenge your decisions will save you from making a lot of blunders and especially when you are about to make decisions emotionally. A person who is vulnerable to you without feeling ashamed or fearing to be judged. Somebody who is interested in those things you like; including a small thing like a movie. My guy will always watch a movie with me in mind. I like the way he says it; “watch blacklist, money heist, whiskey cavalier…. you will like them.” He knows what I like.

This chick/ dude you will be beside them for the longest part of your life. They had better be interesting!

With all this counsel, remember we said God is the best counsel.

This is my prayer for you.

If you are not married yet and you are trusting God for a life partner, may He order your steps. May He give you all the wisdom you require to know the who is really meant for you.

If you are already married and you feel you goofed big time, I pray that God intervenes in your situation and help you realign your marriage. He is interested in your peace and happiness for sure. Marriage was His idea and He want nothing but the best for you.

James 1:5 tells us that if you ask for wisdom, God will give it generously without finding fault: “If any of you lacks wisdomhe should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” …

If you need any type of support; prayer, counsel… don’t hesitate to reach out.

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MY DIARIES

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Just like that, we done with high school. I wouldn’t say I don’t miss the feeling of being a citizen, you have your ID, no bells, bla bla. However, there are experiences I remember and I just get exhausted. I wonder where I got all the strength. Keeping my faith through high school for me was such a big deal. I am grateful to God I pulled through. I am finally a citizen and I have joined a team of youth and every weekend we were up and about preaching; weekend challenges, door to door evangelism, crusades.

“SOUL WINNING”

I will call it a fateful Sunday evening. I am back from some crusade and on getting home, I am told my Christian union patron from high school had just left. He had come looking for me because of a nice opportunity that had come up. Remember this is a person who didn’t come from my neighborhood so for me twas a great deal.

I couldn’t wait for the following day so I could go look for him. The night was long, nothing I deed would shorten the hours. It’s morning finally and off I went to go hear of the great news. Could I hide the excitement from my face? How about feeling special that of all those we had completed school with he just came for me.

A couple that came preaching during our weekend challenges at school had requested that they would be sent her girl who they would mentor on discipleship and missions. What more would a 18 years girl so passionate about the gospel of Jesus Christ ask for. This was the sweetest piece of news ever.

Beloveth, that’s how I became a house help for 3 months. Actually I was so kind to allow them enough time to look for another girl. There is nothing wrong about being a house help! However, someone should have been sincere enough to tell me what they wanted.

We lived in a very posh neighborhood though and this village girl liked everything there. One Saturday morning my employer, for lack of a better name, brings me a dress, sweater and a boob top. I was so excited, I thought they were gifts; I remember saying to myself, its not so bad after all. Little did I know they would be deducted generously from my 3k salary! I however took my lesson, God knew one day I would be an employer. I now know better!

Just like that, the three months notice was done and I am back at the village. Atleast I had gained some experience in cooking and taking care of the little ones. How about travelling to and fro Nairobi alone for the first time. That was an accomplishment.

The little naïve girl’s come back had really ruffled very many feathers and she didn’t even know. Definitely having been to the city for a few days brought with it some improvement in grooming. It didn’t occur to me the special treatment i received was not just because the brothers were good gentlemen😉

Several issues came up, I finally found myself in a 5 years long relationship that I don’t remember someone proposing. For fear of hurting people or what will people, or the church say, I wasted myself big time. Hey girlie, arise! You had better know what you want with yourself, please say no and continue like nothing happened. Dah!

As I write this now, I am happily married for 14 years to a guy that God had preserved for me. He came from nowhere (story for another day). I definitely am not hurting from things that happened when I was 23. I am writing this for you who is feeling confused by all baggage that life has heaped on you.

Looking back, I understand predestination! All I can say is imela papa!

Arise! Shake it off! God has you!