The Desire for Validation

If someone tells you that was a wonderful presentation; or that sermon was powerful, what does it make you feel? Does it make you feel good and your self-worth goes a notch higher? This has left me wondering if self-doubt has become the norm. Right?

This is the one thing that I have struggled with. At some point I am left wondering if I also have problems believing what the word of God says about me.

One time I post something in social media and it has 300 likes and 200 comments. At times I would go through all the likes to see who liked my posts and who commented and what they think of my posts. As though that ain’t enough, I would take offense if a person whom I follow and like each and every post or comment on every post they make do not likewise reciprocate or rather they have never caught an eye on anything I post, even if it was just a photo of myself.

How about those posts I read and are powerful; but simply because these people will never like my comments; I don’t want to leave a comment or like on their posts? Does that make me a jerk or is it Wisdom?? Stop looking at me like that 🙂   These things happen.

How about our choice of clothing; we choose carefully what we wear when and where because; in my opinion we wear for others and not necessarily for ourselves. When you leave the house very smart, in your best, the confidence levels are high that day. How about when you can’t wait to get to work because you are expecting we be all over you claiming how good you look. Supposing no one says about your dressing, it is downright depressing, right?

Have you ever posted a pic for the love of photos like me and this seems to be that “kodak moment” and then someone posts one of those comments that leaves you wondering how on earth can a person be so unkind and unreasonable??

Are you one of the people that are always there for their friends? Anytime they need you, you are responding to all their texts? Are you the one who always calls and you are never called? At times you will even leave missed calls and people won’t call you back. Have you at some point asked yourself how is it that people are too busy for you; or is it you who is too idle or too available?

How does all this make you feel? It could bruise your ego, lower your confidence levels. At times it could even crash your self-esteem. Just wondering does all this change what God thinks of you? Does this change what the bible says about you?

I have been in all these situations. People have had so many misconceptions of me, to some I am unapproachable, to others, I am proud, to others still, I am judgmental, bla. At some point I didn’t believe in me either. Child of God, I have been speaking to me over sometime and I am getting better and I hope this helps you too.

MY COUNSEL

  • Stop seeking validation from people.
  • If you do not respect yourself, no one will.
  • If you don’t love yourself, no one will.
  • John 10:35- The word of God cannot be broken. What the word of God says about you shall never be change only if you believe.
  • Job 22:28- You shall decree a thing and it shall be established for you; and the light shall shine upon your ways. Keep declaring the word of God upon your life and it shall be established for you.
  • Stop trying to be what you are not. Because you are better than that. You are unique, a loyal priesthood. Please be you, no one can be what you are.
  • You are God’s own workmanship. Stop letting yourself down.
  • By the time I am posting a pic or a write up like this, I am always anticipating all types of feedback, criticism because I know there’s someone who will never see any good in me and I have made peace with this fact.
  • I have also learnt to compete only with myself because there will always be people who are better than me and this does not intimidate me at all.
  • Child of God, focus on the purpose of God for you.

I can only pray that the grace of God be sufficient for you.

Lots of love from me to you. Shalom!

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6 thoughts on “The Desire for Validation”

  1. Thank you for this powerful words sis.
    How I desire to trust what God says about me and not what men say.
    I will no longer look for validation from mankind,so help me God.
    Thanx again .
    Keep increasing God’s kingdom by your wisdom.

    Like

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